Ruby Zebra and the Crackers
(Written 11-25-2000)
One of my very favorite snacks is just plain crackers. I just love crackers! I eat them plain. I eat them with peanut butter, with peanut butter and (now sugar free) syrup or preserves; I eat them with peanut butter and bananas. I love 1/4 lb. crackers all crumbled into a can of hot Campbell’s chicken noodle or cream of mushroom soup. I love crackers with a little La Choy soy sauce sprinkled on. I love crackers with “Chinese cheese” (fermented bean cake [fu yi,--tofu.]) I love a can of sardines and crackers or a can of tuna with a little soy sauce and crackers. I love a good hot chili with crackers, or hot salsa and crackers. Any of these are among my favorite meals. My favorite brand now is Keebler. There was a day when brands didn’t matter, but with lots of experience I have a definite choice. It’s not unusual to find a dozen pounds or more of crackers in my cupboard. My doctor says to eat only half a dozen crackers with a meal, but he doesn’t realize that to me a good serving of crackers is almost equal to caviar, a T-bone steak, a platter of shrimp, a lobster or whopping piece of pecan pie. A good store of crackers on hand is a form of riches, as is gold or silver. After all, what are gold and silver for if not to purchase things needed (or wanted,) including good crackers.
When we lived on McFerrin, the Zebra family lived in what was later to become the Donaldson house, across 19th street immediately to the east of us. I was [2-3?] years old at the time. I had the good habit of making the rounds of the neighborhood soliciting, of all things, crackers! I would knock on the back door. Whoever the adult that answered the door, I would invariably ask, in my slow drawl, “Can I have a cracker?” This went on for many, many months. I was almost gratified to get a cracker; and, this satisfied me for the moment.
One day I went to the Zebra’s house on my rounds. I knocked and instead of Mrs. Zebra answering the door, it was their grown daughter Ruby. Ruby was very pretty, and I liked her a lot. From the look on her face I knew right off that something was up, but I didn’t know what. I drawled out my expected request, “Can I have a cracker?” She replied, “I’m sorry, but we don’t have any crackers.” I sighed, and said, “Well,” and took a long, slow breath and continued, “…can I just have a cookie then?” And she broke up with uncontrolled laughter.” I knew then that she was pulling my leg about the cracker, but she got me a cookie anyhow. That’s when I realized that maybe my shenanigans were a little out of line. I think she really meant to teach me a lesson. Anyhow, she did; and, I think that’s when I quit going around the neighborhood begging for crackers. I really loved Ruby Zebra, and in my memory after all these years she is still one of my favorite people, especially at that particular moment.
October 22nd, 2008 at 3:26 pm
I think when Dad refers to “just plain crackers” he’s talking about saltines. That’s what I always saw him eating.